There once was a man from Nantucket,
Whose cock was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it!
There was a young man from Belgrave,
Who found a dead whore in a cave.
It must have taken pluck,
to have a cold fuck;
But think of the money he saved!
There once was a man
who'd invented a fucking machine.
Concave or convex,
it fit either sex,
but boy, was it a bitch to keep clean.
There was an old man
whose cock was shot off in his youth.
He fucked with his nose,
and his fingers and toes,
and he came through a hole in his tooth.
Soon in Paris, on the Boulevard Salique,
Yous should purchase (complet avec talic,
Pour soixante francs cinq)
A short hose and a tank,
And they call it Le Fuckeur Hydraulique
There once was a lady
Who used dynamite to give herself fucky.
They found her vagina,
in North Carolina,
And one of her tits in Kentucky
An exotic young lady
Once danced in a troupe of kabuki,
When asked for a fuck,
he said, "Solly, no luck...
See here: looky looky, no nuki "
Now written especially for Chuck,
On her nipples young Anna has SUCK.
For young Chuck is as thick
As two planks or a brick;
Yes, you've guessed it; her pussy reads FUCK.
It's not that she minds if his prong
Or his tongue on occasions go wrong,
But she's full of despair
'Cause he's SO unaware
That she's now had to label his DONG.
I fuck her low,
I fuck her high,
I fuck her wet, I fuck her dry,
And when she's dead and long forgotten,
I will dig her up, and fuck her rotten
While screwing his wife, Dr. Zuck
In his ears his wife's nipples he stuck.
With his thumb up her bum,
He could hear himself come,
And invented the Radio Fuck!